Faking It

Two of my girlfriends have a strict non-faking policy, but for the most part, we’ve all done it at one time or another. It’s not a crime. Just a non-confrontational way of ending a session that’s gone on too long. If you suspect that the woman you’re with is faking it, try not to take it too personally. Just make sure you ask yourself the important question, “Why?” Here are some possible answers and solutions:

Possible Reasons for her Academy Performance

1. She’s tired. This happens a lot and is not very serious. Often it’s just been a really long day.

Solution: Keep doing what you’re doing and enjoy the show.

2. She doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. This is a little more serious. This usually means that she cares about you, but for some reason or other, you’re not getting her off.

Solution:
The next time you’re in bed together, ask her to show you what she likes.

3. She’s bored. This is often quite serious. It usually means you don’t know what you’re doing, plus she’s tried to show you, and you STILL don’t get it.

Solution: I’m not sure there is one…

4. She’s embarrassed that it’s taking so long. Unless you’ve been looking at your watch, this has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with her own baggage.

Solution: Let her know you’ve got all the time in the world. Try putting things on hold for a few minutes, then pick up where you left off. Showing off the full length of your attention span will likely put her at ease.

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