When it comes to greening up one’s look on St. Patrick’s Day, any plebeian can hit the dollar store for a clover-coloured fright wig or a glitter-bombed plastic leprechaun hat. But you’re the type of St. Paddy’s partier who’ll pass on the food-coloured pitchers of Canadian in favour of a pint of Smithwicks with a Jameson back. You’re also the one in the crowd who finds some stylish ways to get his Irish up.
Inconspicuous
You’re more the strong, silent type, and your comfort zone does not cover acid-green socks (even if said socks are already covered, by your pant legs). For a more subtle, preppy take on the theme, Gap’s deep cedar khakis are just verdant enough to pass muster at the bar but still conservative enough to keep you from feeling the fool. $60
Classy
You’re the sharp-dressed man with an eye for style, and your timing is impeccable: The new pine-green wristwatch from the Toy Watch Sartorial Collection has arrived in the proverbial nick of. Modeled on classic men’s timepieces, the bezel features the brand’s patented “Velvet Touch” construction (it really does feel like velvet) and a leather strap. $190
Environmental
You’re the eco-conscious consumer, so “green” isn’t necessarily a colour. Tech-T by New Zealand sportwear manufacturer Icebreaker happens to be green in both senses of the word. Made from superfine Merino wool culled from small, independent farmers, each garment is issued a so-called “Baacode” (heh) that lets the buyer go online to pinpoint exactly where the sheep used to make this shirt graze. In addition, the company recently conducted tests that prove their garments biodegrade in nine months when buried. $80
Cheap and Cheerful
You’re practical and you don’t want to shell out a lot of greenbacks for something you’ll probably only wear once. Fair enough. Since green doesn’t seem to be on most bargain retailers’ fashion radar this season, finding a quick and, ultimately disposable, hit of forest-coloured flair could be a challenge. Hipster standby American Apparel can always be counted on for last-minute, budget-friendly novelty attire. Case in point: these neon fluorite green socks. $10
Suave
You just don’t like green, and the thought of wearing it, even for one day, is too much. Do an end-run around the whole thing by going abstract. Hermès’ Eau d’Orange Verte is dominated by citrus-and-grass notes — and tell the ladies it comes in a green glass bottle. If you get challenged on your lack of St. Paddy’s spirit, getting a girl to smell your neck to prove your commitment to a cause is a great icebreaker. $100, at Holt Renfew
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Image courtesy of Charles Fred.
