When it comes to dating, breaking the ice can either be victorious or disastrous. Say something too aggressive or corny, and you’ll be shut out with little chance of recovery. On the other hand, if you get off to a good start, your icebreaker can help make a memorable first impression, or at least it will get you the “you may proceed” head nod.
Here are some tips on how to get the conversation started with the woman of your dreams so you don’t have to endure sweaty palms and awkward silences.
You Met a Babe At The Bar
Whatever you do, don’t say “Hi.” You don’t know her, and she certainly doesn’t know you, so “Hi” isn’t going to cut it. You’ll barely get out the syllable before she’s walking away. Trust. So, first thing’s first: be confident, but not arrogant. There’s a difference between the two, and you should know it. Secondly, before you approach, ensure that you’re not drunk and food isn’t on your shirt. First impressions are big in this situation, and no one likes a slob.
Okay, so you’re cool, calm, and collected and wearing a clean shirt. Now you want to make eye contact with your target and say something funny (“Are you drinking a wine spritzer? Are you a grandma, by any chance?”), or that’s reflective of your surroundings (“Does this bar always have such a long line for drinks?”). Either way, you’ve sucked her into a conversation that says you’re ready to play.
You Have Your Eye On That Cute Co-Worker
Workplaces are tricky because you don’t want to be accused of getting all sexual harass-y. If your office has a hockey or Oscars pool going on, that’s a great excuse to slide by her desk to ask if she’d like to participate (and if your office doesn’t have one going on, then that’s a great reason to start). Follow up with, “What’s your favourite hockey team?” “Have you seen any of the movies nominated this year?” Remember: hook, line, and sink ‘er!
You And Your Girlfriend Are Going Through a Dry Spell
You’re horny. It’s been a while since you and your girlfriend have had sex, but you don’t want to be pushy because that’s creepy. In this case, a compliment might do the trick. Women love being complimented and if you can make us feel confident and sexy, even better. Tell her, “You looked really sexy in that black bustier. I would love to see you wear that again for me soon.” There’s a good chance it might turn her on and rev up your sex life again.
You Want To Reconnect With An Ex
In this case, you want to KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid). Whether it’s been weeks or months, or even years, since the breakup, there are probably some lingering feelings involved on both sides. And some of those feelings might not be good feelings, either. Most likely your ex would be caught off-guard by an email or text from you.
The solution: ease into it. Saying “Hi” in this situation is actually permissible. Of course, you should follow that up immediately with a “How are you?” because receiving just “hi” texts are infuriating, especially coming from ex-boyfriends. Trust. Tell her that you’ve been thinking about her recently and wanted to know how she was. Let her steer the conversation from there. Her response (or lack thereof) will prove if she’s willing to melt the ice between you or not.
You Want To Make Up With Your Boo
Sometimes honesty really is the best policy. And humbleness goes a long way, too. So, after you’ve given your partner some space (giving space is super important for both of you to cool off after an argument), approach her with a sincere apology and tell her that you want to make up. However, it’s important your apology comes from the heart. You don’t want to come off as if you’re apologizing simply because you want to have makeup sex later—it has to be sincere. Even a simple, “I’m sorry,” will most likely open doors . . . yes, including the bedroom.
Brianne Hogan is a freelance writer based in Toronto, something of a humorist, and considers herself more Bridget Jones than Samantha Jones. Though she won’t reveal which parts, she will admit to liking emotionally unavailable men and drinking lots of wine. You can follow her on Twitter @briannehogan.
Photo courtesy of flickr.