Who Can You Bribe?

In the past, a greased palm could get you just about anything. But times have changed. Or have they? The only guarantees in life are death and taxes, leaving the effectiveness of the discrete “envelope” open to interpretation. Here, a look at some folks you might still be able to bribe.

The prize:
Legroom and endless booze in first class.
The technique: Include a bill with your passport at check-in, and ask gently. Though airlines have a system to determine upgrades, and head office monitors for irregularities, one airline staffer told us a colleague was recently fired for this offense. Which means it happens — but proceed with caution.

The prize:
A king-sized bed or killer views from your upgraded suite.
The technique: Hide a $50 bill behind your credit card at check-in, and ask for an upgrade. Good chance you’ll wind up in the Presidential Suite. As one clerk notes, desk workers have so much latitude you might not even need the bribe: “Often, you can change your room just by asking.”

The prize:
Favourable calls; selective blindness.
The technique: Before the game, bring some Scotch — or cash — to the refs’ room. With refs usually earning between $25 and $40 a game, victory should come cheap. Yet we found no cases of hockey bribery. Says one ref, “If refs take bribes, they don’t talk about it.”

The prize:
Skip the line and get extra-stiff drinks.
The technique: Offer $20 early on so your bartender remembers you. You’re likely to be rewarded, unless things get too hectic. “If a bartender blatantly gives you first dibs in a heated scrum,” says one industry veteran, “he risks losing other customers’ tips.”


10 thoughts on “Who Can You Bribe?”

  1. Robert Near –
    Quite an awful article. Incredible of bad taste to put out any word in public that tells people it’s ok to bribe. Like it’s ok to steal? Come on… maybe if nobody is looking it would be?

    Disappointing in my opinion.

  2. It’s always better if you know what’s happening in the world. I have often wondered why acquaintenances always boast about the upgrades they “demanded.” I am not much of a briber but but it’s certainly no in bad taste and is well-written – punchy and to-the-point. Thanks Rob

  3. Great article. Re: the first comment, hasn’t he heard Kid Rock’s rant on stealing? BTW, how is tipping related to stealing?

  4. Awesome article…. P.S. The only one’s that worry about the morals of bribing are those that can’t afford it… I see rich dudes doing it all the time and it works….

  5. The only people who worry about bribing are those that cant afford it? I would never bribe a hotel employee, I would just pay for a better room. I can afford that.

  6. Next up for a table at a billiard club in Edmonton was mine for $10 once. Cheap way to jump past 10 others on the list.

  7. the beer-league hockey referee is key, dropped him a twenty last night and we ended up with six extra power plays!

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