Online Dating: What Not to Do, Part 2

Last week, we offered a rundown of some things that should never appear in the pictures you post in an online dating profile. This week, we’ll get to the substance of things: the words. Here, the things you should never write in your profile.

1. Do not round up your height or round down your weight – or age. These are facts; they are not open to interpretation, and any stretching of the truth will be discovered immediately upon meeting.

2. When you say your children will always be number one in your life, it tells us that we’re doomed to play second fiddle, at best.

3. Watch you’re gramar nad spleing. It’s a turnoff when a guy with an MBA can’t differentiate between “to,” “too,” and “two.” Spell check and re-read before posting.

4. Misleading profile information. Too often, we’ve encountered guys who tick off “definitely want kids” when in reality they don’t. In other words, don’t be careless with your profile.

5. References to sex – how often you like it, how good you are at it, etc. – should have no place in your profile, our correspondence, and certainly not in your handle. It’s a turnoff; wait till we meet.

6. A too-wide age gap – if, say, you’re seeking a woman between 18 and 90 – makes you look desperate. It can also make you look like you’ve got mommy issues. Or, even creepier: daughter issues.

Image courtesy of Fe IIya on flickr


7 thoughts on “Online Dating: What Not to Do, Part 2”

  1. All your comments make sense except number two. If a guy has kids, you should assume his kids come first in his life. If they don’t come first in his life, he is a defective human being, and you would be a moron to want to date him. Holy Narcism!

    As for number one, I would say that women are far greater culprits of rounding up their numbers than men. I have met more than a few female linebackers who described themselves as “average” or a “few pounds overweight” in their profiles. . I know 99% of the men would agree with me.


  2. I disagree with you James. What woman or man for that matter wants to know that they will never be a priority in a relationship? It’s one thing to say your kids are very important and if necessary (injured, ill, dealing with a life challenge, etc.) priority one, but to say they will ALWAYS be number one, no matter what raises a red flag for me. What happens if I’m sick, or injured, or need some TLC? If the woman I’m with can never put the kids aside for me, how good can I feel about me, us or the relationship?

  3. Thanks for the tips! Maybe that’s what I’ve been doing wrong…I showed some pics of me and the guys fishing, I thought it was ok to be liberal with the age range I’m interested in – I’m not hung up on younger or older – just looking for nice!!! It’s definitely a challenge “fishing” online so any help you gals can provide is great!

  4. OK Chicks totally lie about their wieght, we all know that, but I’ve never come across one on a dating site that said there kid was more important than me. I have two kids and I hate to admit it, but i would agree with them. that would be a total turnoff for me if someone said it to me. why don’t you chicks work on the weight thing and we’ll work on the kid thing.

  5. What crap! Do you girls even think??? Guys are hurting to meet you and we will do anything to get a front and center seat. If we lie online, it’s just so we can get meet you in person and impress you and dazzle you with our freakin’ manhood! You should be so luck!!!!!

  6. Steve,

    you are clearly not a parent. If you are a parent, you are not a very good one. Being a Dad means putting your kids first. FOREVER. That is what parenting demands. Not just when their sick or injured. Every minute of every day. It doesn’t mean you have no other life at all, but as a parent you are on call and everything else in your life may be put aside if your kids need you. I date often. However, I’ve bagged on the middle of dates because my kids needed me. Did that make my date feel second class? Maybe. Does that enter into the decision whether to got help my kids or not? No.

    If you can’t deal with that, don’t date a parent. Any parent who doesn’t agree isn’t a good parent and I wouldn’t want to know.

  7. J,

    I am a parent and good one, thank you. That’s what my kids (now teenagers) told me recently. They were young when their mother and I split, and I didn’t put my dating life on hold for the next 15 years while I raised them. I simply learned early on that if I didn’t want to be a monk, I needed to figure out the balancing act of being a single parent while dating. I did figure it out, it worked well, and today I have two great kids, close relationships with both of them, AND the most amazing wife I could have asked for. She never felt second best next to the kids while we were dating and the kids didn’t feel neglected while I raised them. Try it, J, you may just like it.

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