jowita bydlowska
A guy approached me in a bar one time and boldly introduced himself. He said, “Hi my name is [Guy’s Name],” and stuck out his hand. I shook it. He made great eye contact – not too intense like he was trying to perform lobotomy on me with his gaze, … Read More
A child is a humanoid parasite that comes in many different shapes and sizes. Sometimes it happens to host on the woman you’re interested in. Sometimes it hosts on your good friend, a former bar guerrilla who swore he would never reproduce, and this renders you speechless. One day, you run … Read More
The kid pulled my hair and called me Monkey. I asked him to marry me and he said, “No, thank you.” He was the perfect man for me: We were four. I was 17 when the boy who just finished having sex with me announced he was breaking it off, … Read More
We need to make books cool again. If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books, don’t fuck them. —John Waters Jesse was better than Michael because Jesse had Jitterbug Perfume by Tom Robbins on the floor (he did not own a shelf) and as he kissed me … Read More
I love looking at men. In fact, often I imagine them naked. I’m old, let me leer. Okay, I’m not old. I’m in my 30s. So, I’m older and sometimes I check out men simply because I can. I’m no Mrs. Robinson but I’m in what amounts to pre-cougar stage. … Read More
